It always said that we should love all the other human in the world and should not hold our grudge towards anyone. These things suit better in the book only. As in real-world, you also know that there are many people who are annoying and it’s very hard to spend any time with them. The immediate options boil down to fight, flight, freeze, surrender. So, how should we deal with those persons? Should we stop talking to those people who tend to annoy us?
Well, this cannot be possible in every case. As there may be a situation that the other person is your batch-mate or work colleague. In such case, you will have to work out spending time alongside him or her. You need a somewhat flexible strategy to cope with annoying people. Well, the proper approach towards these people depends on a number of factors. The importance of the relationship to each party matters a great deal. The best strategy in these cases is Tit for tat. This strategy requires you to be cooperative until the other person is not.
There are different ways to be cooperative or uncooperative.
It is the honest effort to resolve the conflict by discussing it, arranging for mutual understanding. But it has the only limitation that it works only if the other person is also making a good-faith effort to maximise satisfaction. Good meta-communication describes annoying behaviours and annoying people in ways that they would readily agree with.
The fundamental attribution error describes our tendency to appreciate the context of our own foibles while attributing the foibles of other people to character defects. Self-reflection can help us appreciate that other people are operating in contexts.
Sometimes trying to resolve things are not the only solution, you might have established your authority. This can range from insulting them to gossiping in a way that is sure to get back to them to threatening a lawsuit, discipline. In some cases, this might keep them from doing it around you.
The best way of all is to try to avoid such people. You can try to avoid him and maintain a minimal contact. You might ignore a group email, sit through a meeting silently, or just wait for the car blaring loud music to move along.
It insists on not being annoyed, on neither caving or avoiding, in short, ongoing about your business. Done with good humour, this can devastate annoying people, even when that’s not your goal. It’s useful when combined with meta-communication if the annoying person is your child or your therapy patient. Keep calm and carry on.
Yes, it is not easy to remain with the person who tends to annoy you. But, life is tough and you have to focus on your goal rather than thinking about somebody’s others. Just try to get closer to towards your goal and move closer and try to ignore the obstacle coming in your way.